Living with schizoaffective disorder, or any other mental illness for that matter, is most likely a challenging thing. I know it has been for me. Maybe there are some people who feel completely accepting of their condition, completely at peace with their circumstances, and completely fulfilled in their life right from the get go. That is not the way it happened with me. It took years of struggle, anguish, ups and downs, trials and tribulations, to get to a place where I could say “I’m ok.”
Acceptance of the fact that I have a “mental illness,” which I think is a terrible term for it, did not come easy. I had to be beaten to the ground numerous times before I started to respect the illness as something real. Mental illness differs from physical illness in the fact that their are no diagnostic tools to measure it with. It is based on patient descriptions and doctor observations of symptoms. There are no blood tests as of yet that will show an imbalance of a chemical as an indicator of depression, or psychosis, for example. And as hard as it may be to diagnose, it is even harder to accept from the inside.
I am starting this blog as an outlet of expression for me, and as a way to reach people who may be affected by mental illness. It has been nearly a decade since my first hospitalization and diagnosis, and maybe by sharing my experiences of suffering, acceptance, and ultimately healing along my journey of recovery, I can lessen the burden on someone else. One of the most difficult aspects of schizoaffective disorder for me was the inability to relate to others. Hopefully by sharing my journey, others can relate to what I have been through, and find relevant information that may help them along their path.
Thank you for reading, and I wish you the best on your journey of recovery and healing. Remember to be forgiving of yourself and others, and to look for the good in a person or situation.